Summarizing the Reasons for the Delay

Posted on August 20, 2005 by Jenna

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Nasar argues.

Nasar is trying to build a Constitution. His efforts are, he believes, noble, and will, as he imagines them, meet the deadline given to him.

Then he sees the telltale animation for Force of Aggro.

“Ack! I’m being pulled!” he says.

His coworkers on the drafting committee consider this.

“Oh dear,” summarizes Mariam.

“That’s nice,” drawls one of the Sunnis.

Allah has not spoken on pulling, and both of these attitudes are permissible under Islamic law.

FoA lands. Nasar finds himself growing angry. He is very angry at someone named Drisst.

“I must go!” he says.

He tables the business of the meeting. Then he leaps onto the table. Then he pursues Drisst towards the hall.

It is a good pull. There is only one other Shiite whom Nasar passes near, Jalaldin, and Jalaldin is a very low-level Shiite Constitutional Committee Member. Jalaldin links to Nasar but won’t make a very large difference in the struggle to come.

Nasar and Jalaldin leave the chamber where they had been meeting. They pass one of the impassive U.S. golems in its black metal bodysuit. They chase Drisst down the hall. Drisst is moving very quickly. Then he slows down.

“Orz!” shouts Drisst. “Sow plz!”

It echoes through the halls of the Coalition Provisional Authority Zone. Nasar, who does not understand English, finds Drisst’s shout incomprehensible.

“Use your provisional authority!” says Jalaldin, as he runs around to block Drisst’s path.

Nasar begins to glow a brilliant white. Streaks of light radiate upwards from the ground around him. Mysterious sigils appear and disappear in the air. He invokes Asheron’s Provisional Authority. (If this is confusing, please remember that Iraq is a complicated country bringing together many disparate traditions.)

Drisst reels as he acquires the Provisional status effect. This has destroyed many opportunists who seek to derail the Constitutional draft process.

But on this particular occasion the invader survives.

“I help you!” says xSephiroth. xSephiroth is a generic cleric not aligned with either the Sunni or Shi’a faiths. xSephiroth casts a spell on Drisst. Drisst speeds up again. He races off.

“Do something!” cries Nasar, to the U.S. golems, but they are indifferent to invasive pulls.

“They will not infringe upon our sovereignty,” declares Jalaldin.

Grimly, Jalaldin and Nasar follow Drisst and xSephiroth down the halls of the Coalition Provisional Authority Zone, to where the interlopers’ party waits.

P.S. This is also the cause for most domestic government delays.