Category: Legends
What you are actually reading here, most of the time, is a show that is produced and performed by the players at the Gibbelins’ Tower. They’re not the last gasp of folly of a loveless, conscienceless universe where monstrosity reigns over it all! No, they’re lovingly produced phantasmagoria!
— from “Phantasmagoria”
- A Story
- Kids Today
- See Jane
- The Truth
- The River at the Edge of the World
- The Dancing Popes
- Skipping Right Over King Obo-Zed
- Don’t Forget Your Infinite Mercy, Kwan-Yin!
- Hard-Nosed Messianic Acts
- Why Won’t You Fit In Your Box, Speed Racer?
- A Problematic Personality Trait
- The World’s Not Fair to Dead People
- People are So Strange!
- The Righteousness Game
- Two Great Tastes
- Morpheus Explains The Qaballah
- Dumping Glue on a Log
- Necessary Things
- Practical Matters Involving Salvation
- Gandalf’s Secret
- Avoiding the Use of Exclamation Points
- Rolled. Into. One.
- Scanning Things
- Theories Regarding the Box
- A Poorly Timed Deus Ex Machina
- The Endless Hungry Void
- Destiny and Disappointment (Abridged)
- Love Hurts
- Still Life
- The Shelf, And What Happened There
- Excerpt from a Larger Thought
- Martin visits Liz
- Stomping
- An Unfair Advantage
- The Lucky Ones
- Monsters
- A Very Special Episode
- Claire and KA
- A Story, With Marketable Action Figures
- Rainbow Noir
- Gnostella
- I Remember All My Life
- Pets are Funny
- Jane Confronts the Problem of Martin
- Hamlet 2: The Arrows of Fate
- In the Shadow of the Centipede
- The Tyranny of the Mundane
- Blood Wonderland
- Dead Bunny Tango
- Darkness
- The Awa
- In A World Rapidly Turning To Cards
- The Girl And The Rat
- It Goes On Forever
- With A Bit of Jazz
- Hopping Vampire Explains the Five-Element Cycle (Dubbed)
- Four Horsemen
- Regarding Headless Goats
- Invasion
- Greensleeves
- If I Ran The Bay
- Compromises with Hell
- Classifying Things
- Stones Tell
- The Sickness
- Canada
- Wuxia Mumakil
- Jane’s Father
- The Legend of Ink Catherly
- The Division
- (Maundy Thursday) The Messiah Incident
- (Holy Saturday) Catechumens and Killers
- Broderick and the Cracker
- The Siggort in Exile
- The Legend of Ink Catherly
- The Bride of Transgression Bear
- Leaf and Bone Harmony
- Two Short Pieces
- Making Three
- Where They Cried
- Angel Rider
- Why He Wanders
- The Cauldron of the World
- The Interpretation of Spam
- Yet Princes are Mortal
- (Still Sick) Dusk and Dawn
- (Still Iffy) The Remembering People
- (End of Appendices and Bonus Content, Chapter 1) Covered in Bugs
- Progression and Regression
- Downhill, Uphill, Hereabouts
- The Rock at Santa Ynez
- Red Sky at Night
- The Legend of Ink Catherly
- The Golden Age
- Why Botany Matters
- Legend of Burger Bangkok
- Martian Romantic Legends
- The Snake, The Horses, The Tiger, and The Elephant
- Shelley’s Conclusions Regarding Life and Death
- Its Second Stage
- The Choice
- Saul
- Training
- The Legend of Ink Catherly
- The Sea is Not Kind
- The Fortress of Christmas Future
- Cooking
- Scrape. Scrape. Crunch.
- Remembering UE
- Young Horrors
- Observations
- (Fourth of July) Explaining The Decision to Waste Perfectly Good Tea
- Soda and Popcorn
- Press Conference
- Skin and Bones
- Sympathy for a Stranger
- Mechanical Issues
- Issues
- Happily Ever After, with Comet
- A Magic Square
- Ways of Avoiding Migraines
- Unexpected Mystery of the Cold Iron Pope
- The Dancer
- The Big World
- They’re Excessively Smug
- The Bridge
- In the Shadow of the Fire
- The Abbey, After the Rain
- Innovations in Cereal
- A Logical Progression of Imperatives
- The Cabinetmakers’ Secret
- Why the Rooster Crows at Dawn
- Ponies and Wolves
- Angus’ Bad Day
- At The Academy
- King Earth
- A Succession Of Magical Fish
- It’s a Wonderful Murder
- Admonitions for Hungry Divers
- Behold the Rabbit
- In Yemen’s Name
- A Brief Explanation of Werewolves
- Ghost Lemurs and Pygmy Zombies vs. Happy Valley (a Small New England Town)
- Cooking with Negatives
- Meredith’s Fairy Tale
- Brick Road
- Gallows Steve and Ripper Kringle
- Originally Posted on Labor Day
- The Silver Standard
- Titanomachy
- Theory of Centipede
- Crisis in Dorm 31A
- Under the Ice
- The Little Rocket
- Pseudo-Dionysius’ Cookbook
- This Alien Thing
- The Arena, and What Happened There
- At the Cherry Tree
- Standing and Watching
- In My Opinionation
- Morality Fable
- How Pangaea Got Its Groove Back
- The Lake in the Office
- Jane’s Terrifying Story of Near-Halloween Horror
- King Cole
- “A Sanrio Experience”
- So I Will Eat Fugu
- The Elephant Gun
- October Stamps
- Moon over Fallujah
- Bird on Foot
- The Spearman Stays His Hand
- Wakka wakka wakka
- The Plague Carrier
- Great Mother Horror
- The Field of Broken Sky
- Tribulation
- The Messenger
- Once Upon a Time, There Was . . .
- Anecdotes from the Matrix
- Evil Chair: “Perspective”
- Night of the Antinomian
- Verifiable Code
- Sevens
- Fenrir’s Day Off
- The Game One Plays
- The Puppy is Sad
- (Thanksgiving) Stars in Fallujah
- Pulp Formula Bodhisattva (Abridged)
- North
- What Lies Behind the Veil of the World?
- Lord of the Rings IV: King Kong
- 3GTE
- The Factory of Wonderful Things
- Chasing Away the Blues
- Passing Odysseus
- The Cornfield
- The Third Eye of Voles
- He Unlimbers The Hammer
- The Invisible Killer
- Saturday Afternoon Gospel Special, with Mr. Nabisco
- Career Counseling
- The Good Evangelion
- The Hammer of Wizards
- Unto Them On The Left Hand
- Moving Day
- The Failed Escape Attempt
- Careful Attention to Calendars
- Under the Bed
- The Professional Sufferer
- Bankers Do It With Interest
- Sanrio’s Terrible Secret
- The Farm
- Why Don’t Ducks Have Hides?
- The Alien
- Proof and Consequence
- Johnny Pancake
- The Sphere
- The Cautionary Tale of Edmund Zombie
- The Ironic End
- The Seven Perfections Kick
- Panda Dancing
- The Meringue City
- Cats Are
- A World of One
- The Weather Channel Goes the Way of MTV
- Forgotten Things
- Unfinished Things
- Aslan Shrugged: Author’s Note
- Aslan Shrugged: The Wardrobe
- Aslan Shrugged: The Witch
- Aslan Shrugged: The Lion
- It’s Up to You
- Seventy-Two Respects, To Be Precise
- Sword of Il-Roo
- The Eternal Midnight of the Yeastless Soul
- Exactly One Pterodactyl, For Clarity’s Sake
- Soviet Romantic Fantasy
- A Legend Regarding the Gonz, When He’s Not at Work
- The Eerie Shout
- The Legend of Ink Catherly
- Coming Home
- Baggage
- Sour, Bitter, and Sweet
- Jeremiah Clean
- Mr. Enemy
- Legend of Dr. T
- Nightmare of the Rustling
- Legend of the Sifter
- Legend of the Wheel
- Adjective Noun
- (Too Tired to Finish Letters Column Bonus Entry) The Saint of Mirrors
- (Tired Bonus) A Thousand Mice
- (Bonus Content) The Song of Bloody Bill Rhys
- Daphne and Her Dog
- Evil Chair: “For Those Whom You Despise”
- Good Potato and Bad Potato
- The Weight of the Contradiction
- It’s Just That Easy: “The Baby”
- (Not all the way better) The Passion of the Joy Thing
- Oublient: “The Dream of Faith”
- Coprocessor
- Not Unrecorded
- Remus
- The Incredible Alchemy Elixir
- The Incredible Alchemy Elixir (Continued)
- Having Missed the Dragonflies Entirely
- Woo-Wobble-Wobble
- Aloe Vera, in “Secrets”
- Lessons
- Important Facts about Egypt
- Naughty
- The Great Long Road
- Ancient Kings
- Theologians of Mars
- A Castle That Ceases to Move Soon Dies
- When a Bee Loves a Flower Very Very Much, It’s Time to Think of England!
- Fire Safety Checklist
- POE Preliminary Report
- Depending on Shoes
- The Domain of Reason
- Ink in Perspective
- The Covenant of the Sharks
- The Marvelous Hill
- Flood
- Rainbow Noir: The Case of Mr. Dismal
- The Old Well
- Invisible Dog Breeding 101
- The Gift
- The Raining Woman
- Filibuster of the Sailor-Senator
- Angels, Sorvins, Humans, Lancasters, Bainbridges, and Jacks
- This Noble Plant
- The Frog and the Thorn
- Secret of the Sugar Pits
- Dancer in the Night
- The Savage Bureau
- Celebration of the Seals
- Awaiting the Reconciler
- Wired
- Sweeping Day
- Manchester-in-the-Gulch
- The Land Where Suffering is Remembered
- The Cantor
- What Wistful Sally Says
- Dandelions
- Laying the Moral Groundwork
- Countdown to Annihilation! (10:45 to 10:52 am)
- Countdown to Annihilation! (10:52 – 10:57am)
- Lizard Cops
- Countdown to Annihilation! (10:57:28)
- Countdown to Annihilation! (Still Life, with Charles)
- The Chaunt of the Wolves
- Countdown to Annihilation! (10:57:28 – 10:59AM)
- Countdown to Annihilation! (Genesis 2 – 11:00AM)
- DST Nocturne
- Where We Do Not Go
- Ink is Backstage: “Unexplorable Places”
- Ink is Backstage: “Accidental Dispositions”
- Ink is Backstage: “It Means Something Good”
- Hard and Cold
- The Rainbow Wolves
- The Ballad of Bushido Santa
- House of Saints: Edmund’s Hunger
- House of Saints: A Motley Collection of Rogues
- House of Saints: Vladimir’s Dreams
- House of Saints: Intermission at Edmund’s Home
- House of Saints: Vidar’s Boot
- House of Saints: Saturday Morning Special
- House of Saints: A Practically Unsolvable Problem
- House of Saints: Standing in the Storm
- Drunkard’s God: “The Wine-Ogre”
- Drunkard’s God: “The Ale-Man”
- Summarizing the Reasons for the Delay
- (Still Sick) Stacking Mammals and Sid
- The Arachnophobe
- Sellurt and Morgan: Bumping the Dinosaurs
- Sellurt and Morgan: The Ark
- (Boedromion 16: Legend, History, History) Three Short Bits
- (Forward-Fill) Emeline
- The Trouble with Bubbles
- Wilma
- Containment
- The Dying Kind
- No Innards, No Problem
- Slick Jang and the Treason Maw
- Your Yapline and You
- Standing in the Storm: The Keepers’ House
- Standing in the Storm: Their Lives Were Jewels
- The Staff
- Standing in the Storm: Calling to the Wolf
- Standing in the Storm: The Jaguars
- The Broader Context of Her Personal Reality
- The Jewel of the Teaching
- Dhiyampati and the Pluto Project
- Dhiyampati and the Pluto Project (Conclusion)
- Who Dwells in Timeless Tsu-Leng
- Reusing Yesterday’s Punctuation
- Reading Nearby Manuals
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Fallen Knight”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Manfred’s Day”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Glorious Unicorn Santrieste”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Soulless Girl”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Blessing Beyond Price”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Inconstant Shelter”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The House That Runs”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Nine-Fingered Man”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Deathless”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Marvelous Fingerbone”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Tomas vs. Francescu: Fight!”
- Weekend Intermission: Why Penny Has Too Many Arms
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Shadow on the Road”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Saraman Destiny”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Rachel’s Blood”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Manfred on the Road”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Abandoned”
- An Unclean Legacy: “How Elisabet Saved Christmas”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Way of the Ninja”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Spear Named Cursebreaker”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Sophie and the Devil”
- An Unclean Legacy: “The Duel”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Grinding Samael”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Francescu’s Angel”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Despair”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Red”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Violet’s Sin”
- An Unclean Legacy: “One Hundred Golden Men”
- An Unclean Legacy: “Whoever Can Bear the Weight”
- An Unclean Legacy: “And As For Montechristien Gargamel”
- A Comparative Study of Two Fighting Styles
- Coming Down with Chaos
- Death Unsacred
- Higher Jam
- An Oracle for NP
- Wednesday 12/14
- Articulation: “The Worm”
- Articulation: “Sapphire”
- Articulation: “Calandra”
- Articulation: “The Nymph”
- StalaCtites hang from the Ceiling
- Dispatches from the Age of Iron
- Life, Through a Film of Palmolive
- Easy
- It’s a Real Town
- And the Isotopes Remain
- What Was Really Going On
- The Illegitimate Memory of Mr. Brown
- Bang
- It is the Doom of Man
- The Well
- The Sun *WILL* Come Out Tomorrow
- Were It Not
- She Had Forgotten All the Red
- Hans’ Farm
- On Salvation
- Behind the Shelves
- Diverting, of Necessity, to Sports Commentary, before Hitherby Resumes
- The Clash
- Ink in Emptiness: the Lord of Suburbia
- Ink in Emptiness: The Mirror Cracks
- No Actual Bears Were Harmed
- The Uncertainty
- Because “Nil Sine Numine” Was Too Ironic
- The Alphabet Game
- The Top
- The Scarlet Ribbon
- That Way That Snakes, When
- Wednesday 3/08
- The 100% Evil-Free Skeleton
- The Maintenance of the Species
- Morgan-Thurible Laboratories: A Love Story
- He’d Thought It Was Dopamine Overproduction
- If Animals Had Elemental Powers
- Paradise Forgotten
- Such a Strange and Funny Image
- No Legend Today
- The Callous Onslaught of Those Words
- Six’s Story
- The Cautionary Tale of Abermund Plain
- (April 1) What if the Tower Had a Different Cast?
- (Low Saturday) Accidental Properties
- On Politics
- Lacking the Power of Reflection
- Oriane
- The Cut-Off Man’s Father
- Pasta
- A Leopard that Eats Too Many Books
- The Gingerbread Man
- Regarding Hope
- The Dynamite Trilogy: Navvy Jim
- The Dynamite Trilogy: Konami Thunder Dance
- The Dynamite Trilogy: Space
- Intermission – How They Choose the JellO King
- 7 Things Not To Do With Ice
- (September 11)
- Wii News*
- Stitch Doll Boxing
- Legend of Perfectly Defensive Samurai: “Typical Wuxia Lovers”
- Legend of Perfectly Defensive Samurai: “Shadow of Terribly Offensive Shogun!”
- Legend of Perfectly Defensive Samurai: “Legendary Kneeling Lieutenant”
- Legend of Perfectly Defensive Samurai: “Shogun and Samurai”
- Legend of Perfectly Defensive Samurai: “The Breath of Terrible Fire”
- Legend of Perfectly Defensive Samurai: “IN UR ENDING”
- The Battle of Christmas
- Observations on the Child-Alien, by an Anonymous Xenographer
- The Devil and His Daughter
- The Court of Father Time
- It Goes On Forever (A Variation)
- The Cougar
- The Song of Jeremiah Gannon: First Canto
- The Song of Jeremiah Gannon: Second Canto
- The Song of Jeremiah Gannon: Third Canto
- The Song of Jeremiah Gannon: Final Canto
- A Quick Note on Belgium
- Nthanda
- It Falls
- “Alaia”: Introduction
- “Alaia”: The Commission
- “Alaia”: The Gums of Kailani Tate
- “Alaia”: The Clarification
- “Alaia”: The First Tooth
- “Alaia”: The Wild Wide Field
- “Alaia”: Bleakness
- “Alaia”: Craft
- Salwa and the Bears
- On the Hill
- On the Origins of Common Foods
- My Neighbor Samara
- Colony Collapse
- Frognarok
- A Guide to Giant Monster Country Cuisine
- Harbinger
- Hangman
- The Gesundheit Stratagem
- Fire on the Tongue
- No Crutches for an Angel
- The Last Unspoken Words
- R&R
- Shushiriken
- Rainbow Noir: the Mountains and the Sky
- As To Why You Should Drink the Coffee We Sell Here, as Opposed to the Coffee Sold in World and Sound
- Ping
- The Gate of No Returning
- Objective Magical Sources
- Respawn Star
- Better Than None
- I Think She’s Maybe a Courier?