Category: Essays
Many of you don’t believe in Canadians. But they’re real, and they’re all among us. They’re not just claiming to be Canadians to be special, either. They really are. It’s part of their nature. It’s who they are. It’s not a choice. It’s something that’s inborn, or, sometimes, picked up from the environment.
— from “Canada”
- Why Won’t You Fit In Your Box, Speed Racer?
- A Problematic Personality Trait
- Rolled. Into. One.
- Dragons
- Excerpt from a Larger Thought
- Dead Bunny Tango
- Canada
- Cooking
- Observations
- A Brief Explanation of Werewolves
- Cooking with Negatives
- October Stamps
- The Third Eye of Voles
- Career Counseling
- Sanrio’s Terrible Secret
- Why Don’t Ducks Have Hides?
- It’s Up to You
- Seventy-Two Respects, To Be Precise
- The Eternal Midnight of the Yeastless Soul
- Important Facts about Egypt
- Ancient Kings
- Fire Safety Checklist
- (Bonus Content) Flowers on the Moon
- This Noble Plant
- Laying the Moral Groundwork
- Your Yapline and You
- Wednesday 12/14
- It is the Doom of Man
- Diverting, of Necessity, to Sports Commentary, before Hitherby Resumes
- A Leopard that Eats Too Many Books
- 7 Things Not To Do With Ice
- On the Origins of Common Foods
- A Guide to Giant Monster Country Cuisine